Something caught my eye on the Daily Show last week. I haven’t followed the offshore drilling issue all that closely but a montage of Republican members of congress complaining about the Democrats’ proposals to only drill at least 50 miles from shore did make me laugh. In particular one congressman claimed that most offshore oil reserves were based 3-50 miles from shore. You want to drill for oil three miles from shore??!! THREE MILES!!!!! As in, clearly visible from the beach!!! What would this mean?

– On a good day, children could skim stones all the way to the platform

– There could be a new tourist attraction – swim with the dolphins under the rig

– John Kerry could windsurf out to it (by the way, how is it that if you stand on a flat board in the sea you can be called a lazy beach bum – add a little sail to it and you’re an out of touch elitist)

– It wouldn’t require an oil spill to close the beach, just a worker dropping a dirty rag over the side

– If the Olympics were awarded to a nearby city, they could use the rig as the marker for the swim portion of the triathlon

– On the upside, if there was a hurricane, one returning resident, on finding their house destroyed, could bed down on Exxon platform 83   


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